Frank Iero = Dionysus Hornblower (the scene where the Unspeakables attack the press is seriously one of my favorites; I love Dionysus). I think Brian has to be Snape, and I KIND OF WANT BERT TO BE DRACO. Honestly, this is kind of hard because I'll think of something and then be like, but I don't WANT Maja to be an organized psycopath rapist! There are TOO MANY awesome villains in the SA. Ryan Ross would be an awesome Zacharias, though.

Thinking about this so much just makes me want a bandom/HP crossover more and more. Especially one where Gabe borderline stalks Harry for more of the sexy snake talking. Mikey Way bonds with Hagrid over unicorn-love. Brendon Urie worships the Weasely twins. Bob insists immediately on a permanent flame-repelling charm. Shenanigans, basically.

ETA: Um. PETE WENTZ = THE WILD DARK.