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Je Suis LOSER
So I posted an RPF list, What Fourth Wall?, on the 6th and then I heard about the Panic break-up two hours later and totally spaced it. But it's bandom (some Big Bang, some not), American Idol, Gossip Girl, Star Trek XI, and SPN, plus Lil Wayne and Amanda Palmer (who maybe counts as bandom, even though she's not in a bandom band? I don't even know anymore).
ALSO. There's this thing? This awesome, awesome thing? Where they're taking bandom hurt/comfort prompts?
Prompts I have posted so far:
1. WHIPPING BOYS. I cannot believe I forgot whipping boys yesterday.
2. Widow(er) falls in love with their best friend OR the spouse's sibling.
3. Deep cover operative Brendon is masquerading as a whore (or possibly the kept boy of one particular criminal, whatever floats your boat) to bring down a notoriously clannish crime syndicate. When his handler falls out of contact, what will he do?
4. Evil orphanage ala Slumdog Millionaire; basically, I just want someone to last-minute rescue a singer from getting their eyes burned out. Or possibly there is no rescue, but there is lots of guilt and comforting and revenge. EITHER WAY.
5. When the zombie apocalypse begins, X is separated from their band and must fight their way back to them. And I will love you forever if you manage to work in that Bob Bryar takes no shit from zombies.
6. Possibly too much H, not enough C, but: X accidentally causes the zombie apocalypse when they resurrect a loved one.
7. Regency AU. X's reputation has been ruined by the spread of scurrilous lies! Y must fight a duel in their defense! Will Y be rewarded with X's hand in marriage?
8. Anyone fighting in anyone's honor, omg. Insults that cannot be borne! Swords at dawn, or possibly pistols at noon! The tearful bandaging of manly wounds (all dueling wounds are manly, even when the duelist is a lady)!
9. Gabe + Nate + basement + Stockholm Syndrome!
I don't care if it's actual SS or Gabe is afraid it's SS or it's the rest of the band making SS jokes while Gabe has healing sex with broken-hearted Nate in his basement of love (which is like a cage!).
10. A Panic version of Beauty & the Beast, where Brendon is Beauty, Spencer is the Beast, Ryan is Cogsworth, and Jon is Lumiere. Can be Brendon/Spencer or there is the GSF version with EXTRA ANGST. The spell is broken, and Spencer and Ryan and Jon are all clingy because they helped each other with the transformation last time and they just need someone there who understands when they feel the need to be like "I missed having toes!" or whatever. Brendon feels very left out and angsty because the curse was broken when he fell in love with Spencer, nothing said it had to be requited love! AND THEN THEY ALL HAVE SEX, THE END.
11. After an accident, X is left with extensive and disfiguring scarring.
12. AU where X and Y are a team of professional spies or assassins and Z is blackmailed (friend held hostage by X and Y's target) into laying a honey trap for one or both.
13. X finds out about SO's cheating when a routine doctor visit turns up an STD (something treatable, please). Can best friend Y heal X's bitter heart?
14. PSYCHIC VAMPIRES. X must feed on positive emotions or die, but the more often a person is fed on, the less able they are to feel those emotions (they can regain the ability after a time, but they remain more susceptible). So X must pass through life without forming lasting ties, because feeding isn't entirely voluntary. UNTIL. Someone (or more than one someone!) is immune to the negative side effects. But can that someone accept X as they are?
15. Day After Tomorrow AU!
16. Alien sex slaves (the cages are forcefields)! X started with a non-humanoid who did not necessarily grok human physical needs. The next master can only be better right? WRONG. Eventualy, X joins Y's harem and there is healing sex. Y may or may not be a secret abolitionist.
17. U and V run a group home for troubled teens. W, X, Y, and Z are the newest residents.
18. Psychic AU. Gerard/Pete is a powerful psychometrist who consults with the police, even though the experience is horrific. Bob/Patrick is the detective assigned as his handler.
19. Gerard stars in a cabaret. Frank (or Bob!) first falls in love with her on stage, so Gerard thinks he is really only interested in Gee (or whatever you want the drag name to be). Possibly he has been a trophy fuck/experiment before (NOT with Bert)! Frank (or Bob!) must prove he loves the whole person. You know. With his penis.
20. After Gerard (or someone close to him) gets out of a toxic relationship (verbal abuse, physical abuse, other abuse, your choice), he starts/runs a domestic abuse center/helpline. It could be gen OR there could be a new volunteer who helps him deal with his issues and find love again.
21. I love a good GSF gangbang, but you know what I'd love to read? The morning-after-gangbang where Brendon (...random example) is all sore and his band spoils him because it's their fault but he can't take advantage because what if they feel too guilty and won't do it again?
22. No band AU, where just-legal Brendon is disowned for being gay and ends up at a homeless shelter (a MILLION bonus points to any author who has actual experience w/ shelters). He gets a job, but it takes a while to save up for a place. He tries to hide his situation from his new friends, but there is some kind of emergency and his secret is out! AND THEN THERE ARE CUDDLES, AND POSSIBLY THE HEALING SEX.
23. Brendon fights with his band and runs away...to Gabe's basement.
24. X is hopelessly in love with Y, and has been for years. But Y is in a committed relationship with an awesome lady, Z! Z and Y ask X for a threesome and there is angst (they are using him for sex! what if they're breaking up? he doesn't want them to break up, they're good for each other!), but it totally ends in happy long-term X/Y/Z.
25. Gerard worries that Umbrella Academy's numbers are more about Gerard Motherfucking Way and less about the comic itself so he publishes an indie comic under another name, being supersecretive about it. Maybe it gets panned or maybe it's a cult hit, but either way, someone connects it to him and calls him an idiot, talented, but an idiot.
26. A fan sends Gabe a snake and his band then finds out that in real life, he is incredibly creeped out by their little unblinking soulless eyes. And the snake gets loose somewhere on the bus. Gabe refuses to be left alone until a successful capture.
Preferably GSF, because that's pretty much how I want all CS stories to end, but it can totally be gen/pairing of your choice.
27. I thought about doing "X member of Panic" but then I realized that this way is the ridiculous/sexy threesome I never knew I always wanted:
Brendon is really torn up about Ryan's new cokewhore ways (possibly they are ex-boyfriends, possibly it is just platonic angst). He ends up spending a lot of time with Bronx, because it's hard to be sad when there is an adorable baby right there. And then Pete and Ashlee comfort him with sex.
28. Katy Perry, objectification/esteem issues. F/f would be awesome, or Katy/Brendon. Oh, epiphany, Katy/Ashlee would be amazing for this, but really, whatever you want.
29. Demon hunter Lyn-Z falls for faily demon Gerard. Angst! It's her mission to kill him! He was born to bring misery to man! It's just, he's so bad at it.
30. Vicky-T falls in love. One problem: the relationship was just supposed to be part of her cover identity and everything her lover knows about her is a lie.
31. A drunken girls' night out and a few too many stories about scene assholes leads to the formation of the supergroup, Haters to the Left. Cue revenge through scathing lyrics!
32. Band girl of your choice ends up pregnant and alone and (eventually) in love with her best friend. No, really, all I want is some h/c femslash with domesticity.
33. Post-split, Brendon and Spencer get very clingy and exclusive with each other. Then on tour one morning, THEY WAKE UP MARRIED. Because apparently when they were drunk/stoned/otherwise out of their minds, the most important thing in the world was saying in a very binding way "I will never leave you!" Problem one, they've never even fooled around with each other, let alone dated. Problem two, Brendon's in a relationship...with Shane.
Obvs I would like this to end in happy ever after threesome, but Brendon/Shane with platonic life partner Spencer would also be awesome. And one other thing: the marriage should be unconsummated in the morning because 1) partner betrayal makes my heart hurt and 2) if you are intoxicated enough to marry a dude you're not even dating, you are too intoxicated to get it up. But! Author's prerogative.
34. Jesse Lacey/John Nolan, (canon!) fighting through songs.
35. Ray Toro has the world's shittiest luck. He dumped his cheating ex and quit their band right before they got signed. Now they're rising to pop-stardom with his music and he's busking for rent money. When he meets and falls for his replacement, is it going to be one more kick in the teeth or is his luck finally changing? (Ray/Patrick would be awesome, but your choice)
36. Death Race AU: Three-time speedway champion and ex-con Bob Bryar is framed for the murder of his wife by a corrupt prison warden so that he can take the place of "Frankenstein" - an immensely popular masked driver killed in the last race - in the prison's upcoming Death Race. He agrees; in one race and he wins his freedom - and the chance to see his daughter again. But the race isn't designed to be won. It's designed to entertain the viewing public with as many violent deaths as possible. Can Bryar survive the other racers, outsmart the warden, resist his sexy but possibly double-crossing navigator, and get his kid back?
37. Travis is the bartender (or MC or whatever) at the club where Brendon and Katy are strippers/burlesque dancers (possibly they have a double act, possibly they are just BFFs that have sex sometimes). One night somebody flips the fuck out and pulls a gun and BAD THINGS happen to Brendon and/or Katy. Travis tears himself up about it, because these are the people he l- has feelings for and all he could do was watch as they were hurt and what kind of a useless motherfucker is he? CUE COMFORT THREESOME.
38. With no friends and a family that still won't speak to him, Brendon may be lonely, but he has a lot of time to practice his music. To the world, he's just a member of the reclusive band ______. In reality, he created the "band" and started crediting instruments to different aliases after the uncomfortable experience recording his first album (not particularly successful, but enough to get him signed by rookie A&R Pete, the only one who knows about the charade); people got weird when he really didn't need session musicians. Then he - or one of the aliases - gets approached about a job by Ryan Ross of Summer League and SHENANIGANS ENSUE. A man with secrets + a band already burned by losing a member = trouble. Will someone convince Brendon to trust again or is he doomed to be alone?
39. Greta as Gerda in The Snow Queen.
40. Bandmembers of your choice are all contestants on an Idol-esque reality show. In a "private coaching session", somebody gets bad-touched (or worse). Do they hide it? Tell the other contestants? Tell the producers (do the producers believe them)? Is there an accusation scene in front of a live studio audience? Does the host have to take a special moment to explain to America why one of the trainers was hauled off in handcuffs in front of a TMZ camera earlier that day?
41. ...I totally do have a craving for Brendon getting pneumonia.
ALSO. There's this thing? This awesome, awesome thing? Where they're taking bandom hurt/comfort prompts?
Prompts I have posted so far:
1. WHIPPING BOYS. I cannot believe I forgot whipping boys yesterday.
2. Widow(er) falls in love with their best friend OR the spouse's sibling.
3. Deep cover operative Brendon is masquerading as a whore (or possibly the kept boy of one particular criminal, whatever floats your boat) to bring down a notoriously clannish crime syndicate. When his handler falls out of contact, what will he do?
4. Evil orphanage ala Slumdog Millionaire; basically, I just want someone to last-minute rescue a singer from getting their eyes burned out. Or possibly there is no rescue, but there is lots of guilt and comforting and revenge. EITHER WAY.
5. When the zombie apocalypse begins, X is separated from their band and must fight their way back to them. And I will love you forever if you manage to work in that Bob Bryar takes no shit from zombies.
6. Possibly too much H, not enough C, but: X accidentally causes the zombie apocalypse when they resurrect a loved one.
7. Regency AU. X's reputation has been ruined by the spread of scurrilous lies! Y must fight a duel in their defense! Will Y be rewarded with X's hand in marriage?
8. Anyone fighting in anyone's honor, omg. Insults that cannot be borne! Swords at dawn, or possibly pistols at noon! The tearful bandaging of manly wounds (all dueling wounds are manly, even when the duelist is a lady)!
9. Gabe + Nate + basement + Stockholm Syndrome!
I don't care if it's actual SS or Gabe is afraid it's SS or it's the rest of the band making SS jokes while Gabe has healing sex with broken-hearted Nate in his basement of love (which is like a cage!).
10. A Panic version of Beauty & the Beast, where Brendon is Beauty, Spencer is the Beast, Ryan is Cogsworth, and Jon is Lumiere. Can be Brendon/Spencer or there is the GSF version with EXTRA ANGST. The spell is broken, and Spencer and Ryan and Jon are all clingy because they helped each other with the transformation last time and they just need someone there who understands when they feel the need to be like "I missed having toes!" or whatever. Brendon feels very left out and angsty because the curse was broken when he fell in love with Spencer, nothing said it had to be requited love! AND THEN THEY ALL HAVE SEX, THE END.
11. After an accident, X is left with extensive and disfiguring scarring.
12. AU where X and Y are a team of professional spies or assassins and Z is blackmailed (friend held hostage by X and Y's target) into laying a honey trap for one or both.
13. X finds out about SO's cheating when a routine doctor visit turns up an STD (something treatable, please). Can best friend Y heal X's bitter heart?
14. PSYCHIC VAMPIRES. X must feed on positive emotions or die, but the more often a person is fed on, the less able they are to feel those emotions (they can regain the ability after a time, but they remain more susceptible). So X must pass through life without forming lasting ties, because feeding isn't entirely voluntary. UNTIL. Someone (or more than one someone!) is immune to the negative side effects. But can that someone accept X as they are?
15. Day After Tomorrow AU!
16. Alien sex slaves (the cages are forcefields)! X started with a non-humanoid who did not necessarily grok human physical needs. The next master can only be better right? WRONG. Eventualy, X joins Y's harem and there is healing sex. Y may or may not be a secret abolitionist.
17. U and V run a group home for troubled teens. W, X, Y, and Z are the newest residents.
18. Psychic AU. Gerard/Pete is a powerful psychometrist who consults with the police, even though the experience is horrific. Bob/Patrick is the detective assigned as his handler.
19. Gerard stars in a cabaret. Frank (or Bob!) first falls in love with her on stage, so Gerard thinks he is really only interested in Gee (or whatever you want the drag name to be). Possibly he has been a trophy fuck/experiment before (NOT with Bert)! Frank (or Bob!) must prove he loves the whole person. You know. With his penis.
20. After Gerard (or someone close to him) gets out of a toxic relationship (verbal abuse, physical abuse, other abuse, your choice), he starts/runs a domestic abuse center/helpline. It could be gen OR there could be a new volunteer who helps him deal with his issues and find love again.
21. I love a good GSF gangbang, but you know what I'd love to read? The morning-after-gangbang where Brendon (...random example) is all sore and his band spoils him because it's their fault but he can't take advantage because what if they feel too guilty and won't do it again?
22. No band AU, where just-legal Brendon is disowned for being gay and ends up at a homeless shelter (a MILLION bonus points to any author who has actual experience w/ shelters). He gets a job, but it takes a while to save up for a place. He tries to hide his situation from his new friends, but there is some kind of emergency and his secret is out! AND THEN THERE ARE CUDDLES, AND POSSIBLY THE HEALING SEX.
23. Brendon fights with his band and runs away...to Gabe's basement.
24. X is hopelessly in love with Y, and has been for years. But Y is in a committed relationship with an awesome lady, Z! Z and Y ask X for a threesome and there is angst (they are using him for sex! what if they're breaking up? he doesn't want them to break up, they're good for each other!), but it totally ends in happy long-term X/Y/Z.
25. Gerard worries that Umbrella Academy's numbers are more about Gerard Motherfucking Way and less about the comic itself so he publishes an indie comic under another name, being supersecretive about it. Maybe it gets panned or maybe it's a cult hit, but either way, someone connects it to him and calls him an idiot, talented, but an idiot.
26. A fan sends Gabe a snake and his band then finds out that in real life, he is incredibly creeped out by their little unblinking soulless eyes. And the snake gets loose somewhere on the bus. Gabe refuses to be left alone until a successful capture.
Preferably GSF, because that's pretty much how I want all CS stories to end, but it can totally be gen/pairing of your choice.
27. I thought about doing "X member of Panic" but then I realized that this way is the ridiculous/sexy threesome I never knew I always wanted:
Brendon is really torn up about Ryan's new cokewhore ways (possibly they are ex-boyfriends, possibly it is just platonic angst). He ends up spending a lot of time with Bronx, because it's hard to be sad when there is an adorable baby right there. And then Pete and Ashlee comfort him with sex.
28. Katy Perry, objectification/esteem issues. F/f would be awesome, or Katy/Brendon. Oh, epiphany, Katy/Ashlee would be amazing for this, but really, whatever you want.
29. Demon hunter Lyn-Z falls for faily demon Gerard. Angst! It's her mission to kill him! He was born to bring misery to man! It's just, he's so bad at it.
30. Vicky-T falls in love. One problem: the relationship was just supposed to be part of her cover identity and everything her lover knows about her is a lie.
31. A drunken girls' night out and a few too many stories about scene assholes leads to the formation of the supergroup, Haters to the Left. Cue revenge through scathing lyrics!
32. Band girl of your choice ends up pregnant and alone and (eventually) in love with her best friend. No, really, all I want is some h/c femslash with domesticity.
33. Post-split, Brendon and Spencer get very clingy and exclusive with each other. Then on tour one morning, THEY WAKE UP MARRIED. Because apparently when they were drunk/stoned/otherwise out of their minds, the most important thing in the world was saying in a very binding way "I will never leave you!" Problem one, they've never even fooled around with each other, let alone dated. Problem two, Brendon's in a relationship...with Shane.
Obvs I would like this to end in happy ever after threesome, but Brendon/Shane with platonic life partner Spencer would also be awesome. And one other thing: the marriage should be unconsummated in the morning because 1) partner betrayal makes my heart hurt and 2) if you are intoxicated enough to marry a dude you're not even dating, you are too intoxicated to get it up. But! Author's prerogative.
34. Jesse Lacey/John Nolan, (canon!) fighting through songs.
35. Ray Toro has the world's shittiest luck. He dumped his cheating ex and quit their band right before they got signed. Now they're rising to pop-stardom with his music and he's busking for rent money. When he meets and falls for his replacement, is it going to be one more kick in the teeth or is his luck finally changing? (Ray/Patrick would be awesome, but your choice)
36. Death Race AU: Three-time speedway champion and ex-con Bob Bryar is framed for the murder of his wife by a corrupt prison warden so that he can take the place of "Frankenstein" - an immensely popular masked driver killed in the last race - in the prison's upcoming Death Race. He agrees; in one race and he wins his freedom - and the chance to see his daughter again. But the race isn't designed to be won. It's designed to entertain the viewing public with as many violent deaths as possible. Can Bryar survive the other racers, outsmart the warden, resist his sexy but possibly double-crossing navigator, and get his kid back?
37. Travis is the bartender (or MC or whatever) at the club where Brendon and Katy are strippers/burlesque dancers (possibly they have a double act, possibly they are just BFFs that have sex sometimes). One night somebody flips the fuck out and pulls a gun and BAD THINGS happen to Brendon and/or Katy. Travis tears himself up about it, because these are the people he l- has feelings for and all he could do was watch as they were hurt and what kind of a useless motherfucker is he? CUE COMFORT THREESOME.
38. With no friends and a family that still won't speak to him, Brendon may be lonely, but he has a lot of time to practice his music. To the world, he's just a member of the reclusive band ______. In reality, he created the "band" and started crediting instruments to different aliases after the uncomfortable experience recording his first album (not particularly successful, but enough to get him signed by rookie A&R Pete, the only one who knows about the charade); people got weird when he really didn't need session musicians. Then he - or one of the aliases - gets approached about a job by Ryan Ross of Summer League and SHENANIGANS ENSUE. A man with secrets + a band already burned by losing a member = trouble. Will someone convince Brendon to trust again or is he doomed to be alone?
39. Greta as Gerda in The Snow Queen.
40. Bandmembers of your choice are all contestants on an Idol-esque reality show. In a "private coaching session", somebody gets bad-touched (or worse). Do they hide it? Tell the other contestants? Tell the producers (do the producers believe them)? Is there an accusation scene in front of a live studio audience? Does the host have to take a special moment to explain to America why one of the trainers was hauled off in handcuffs in front of a TMZ camera earlier that day?
41. ...I totally do have a craving for Brendon getting pneumonia.