Internet, Come Share My Horror/Glee

I WAS CLEANING AND I FOUND DARA JOY'S RITUAL OF PROOF, AKA, THE ONE WITH THE MAN-HYMEN. I CAN NEVER GET RID OF IT, BUT I WILL NEVER READ IT AGAIN. IT WILL SIMPLY LURK ON THE BOOKCASE IN MY CLOSET, WAITING. WAITING FOR ONE OF MY POOR FRIENDS TO INDICATE EVEN VAGUELY THAT SHE COULD BE FORCED TO READ THIS THING.

IT'S LIKE THE HORRIBLE CANDY YOU WANT TO FOIST ONTO EVERYONE YOU KNOW.

EXCEPT THIS CANDY HAS MAN-HYMENS, AND VAGINAL SECRETIONS APPARENTLY CONTAIN SOME KIND OF ACID FOR THE REMOVAL THEREOF.

FOR FUCKING REAL, YOU GUYS. FOR REAL. THEY SOLD THIS AT, LIKE, WAL-MART.