
You know, I'm probably a horrible person for even thinking this, let alone admitting it to the world at large, but having a mom who's so totally screwed up her own life is very...freeing.
Because no matter what, I can look back and say "At least I did better than Mom".
Seriously, she was about ready to throw me a party when I made it to sixteen still a virgin. Because at fifteen she was pregnant and married to an abusive asshole. She's an addict. She didn't graduate high school; she dropped out, though she later got her G.E.D. She's so crazy that the federal government pays her to stay out of the work force.
I just...with my dad, there's all kinds of crazy high expectations. He worked his way up from the bottom! He got two degrees! He went from working on an oil rig to being a highly respected career geek (actual job title: "senior technical resource"). He never got a B in his whole life.
He expects all kinds of things from me, like academic excellence and fiscal responsibility and habitual honesty and, y'know, other evidences of good character.
But with Mom, as long as I remain clean, sober, and not accidentally pregnant (or serving actual prison time), I basically win at life. That part's...nice.
I am a horrible child.